Thursday, July 23, 2009

Facebook

by
Patti Dickinson

Last time I stuck my toe into controversial waters I got dunked.

That being said, I am going to give this another lap (I'm trying to stay with the "water" metaphor, and it's not working too well...)

Facebook. I don't get it. It is superficial. It is the written equivalent of chit-chat. I dislike the in-your-face political stuff. I would much rather engage in a face-to-face dialogue. A time for both sides to be heard, instead of just a knee-jerk response to something on the news/in the KC Star. A response that just sort of hangs there, and there may or may not be any "takers".

A way to keep in touch? Hmmm. There's the phone, there's email, there's the postal service (don't laugh...I wrote four letters last week....yup, envelopes and stamps!) Even texting seems more intimate in comparison. A more back-and-forth kind of dialogue.

Facebook seems kind of narcisistic to me. I mean, is there really someone out there that cares that I just mowed my lawn? That I forgot to exercise three days in a row? That my kid had a cavity? That my microwave is on the fritz and the repairman is an hour late?

Maybe Facebook helps us be more in touch with people we wouldn't be in touch with otherwise. More in touch but with not much substance?

Thoughts?








3 comments:

Christine said...

Whatever one's views are on Facebook, I'm glad to be a part of it because it got me in touch with you and Elizabeth for the first time in decades. This has been the case with so many people in my life, and I have seen so much good come from it.

Sometimes we need the idle chit chat to get things going socially, whether it's typed or spoken humans have engaged in that superficial drivel for centuries...for some reason we love it. Just last night I instant messaged with someone on Facebook from Columbia, South America and I felt a deep connection with that person. The conversation was enriching for both of us, and because he found me he is seriously contemplating adoption.

I'm all for Facebook... now, Twitter and endlessly addictive texting are another story. To each their own.

Anonymous said...

I am not a telephone person. I've noticed many people who are -- my brother, for instance -- and they usually have a highly active social life and they do get things done. But for me, talking on the phone requires some concentration. I can't see the person so the only feedback I get is from one ear, and always there are other things going on around me when I'm on the phone, making it hard to concentrate.

And these days, the telephone seems to trump face to face contact. Haven't you been visiting with someone, having lunch, or even in a business meeting or whatever, and they say, "excuse me" and answer their phone? Or, worse still, they decide to call someone else instead of talking to you?

Face to face is really best, of course, but the reality of trying to connect with my friends in New York means usually needing to allow for two hours travel time, and therefore an appointment at a specified time. I do have lots of quick face-to-face chats with my neighbors when I run into them while walking the dog, or at the bakery, etc., but there's no way I can just run into you, Patti! Except on line. Since you're blogging that works well, and I'm glad to be in touch.

The issue with Facebook is that I do have perhaps "too many" friends, and some I'd like to know more about don't provide status updates as frequently as others to whom I don't feel all that close. But I accepted the "friend" or asked to be friended for a reason, and I do sometimes "hide" updates from those who update all the time. But I like facebook. I can see photos of people who were once part of my life and see what they are enjoying now. And when friends from Thailand and Malaysia wish me save travels as I go to visit my mother for her 93rd birthday -- well, that's just nice, that's all.

Anonymous said...

I love FaceBook b/c I can share in weddings and births and see all I'm missing from my friends and family in France. They get to see how my kids are growing on this side of the ocean, and I very much appreciate the ease we can communicate.

BUT the reason I logged on this morning was to say "WOW....I loved the KC Star piece on you guys and your book!!!" I LOVE IT. I can't come to the Rainy Day Books signing, but I've got the B&N one on my calendar. Way to go!!!!!!

Sara Grier