Missing those kids already

by

Patti Dickinson

It's that time of year.....the dwindling days of August segue into a life that is measured by semesters. Flip flops scattered throughout each room of the house are replaced by backpacks, volleyball knee pads and Strawberry Gatorade bottles. It's time for school to start. I am reminded of the lyrics to one of my favorite tunes, Closing Time, by Semisonic. "Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."

And so, the summer of 2009 is almost over. This summer Kathleen graduated from Knox and took up residence in Chicago, and is finding her way in the "real world". Mary got into Nursing School, and sat at the table this morning, ordering her stethoscope and scrubs for her clinicals. Andrew is loading up the dining room with boxes the way only a first-time-heading-off-to-college-kid can. Toaster and a dvd player. Toast and a movie....that should get a college kid through the worst of days... Meghan is ready for her sophomore year, anticipating volleyball tryouts. Margaret is on a different journey....finding her way through the maze of middle school.

I can sense the college kids pulling away a bit....making it easier for them, in a week or two to end their summer at home. Leaving boyfriends/girlfriends behind. A sadness that none of us are talking about. We know what's coming but we don't speak of it. I miss the small things....the chime of the door alarm as the teenagers come in, late at night, one at a time. I miss sitting in the kitchen with my kids, as they one at a time come downstairs in the morning, sleepy eyed, and sit at the table and talk to me. This is conversation that can only happen face-to-face.

How blessed I am that I dread the beginning of school....we trade those flip flops and the scent of suntan lotion and wet towels all over the house for backpacks, homework at the kitchen table, lost library books and a schedule with little flexibility. I'm sort of one of the last moms standing....fighting back tears as we take those oh-so-corny first day of school pictures in the driveway.