Betwixt & Between---More Jelly To The Tree

by Pat Antonopoulos

If you, Gentle Reader, are a regular visitor to our blog, you know I can get mired in something that struggles in the beginning---and completely flounders at the end. That 'something' often lurks at the edge of my awareness for weeks as I try to sort the slots.

Communication is the 'how' when we want the 'why' of relationships. We care about another person and we want the best for that developing relationship. Communication is the 'how' of that growth.

Knee-jerk verbal put-downs directed at others and self deprecating whispers used against self have to be first cousins, if not blood.

Cannot imagine any relationship being improved by the quick tongue that blurts the negative. Even if the negative is directed at someone who is not present, the damage is real. We emotionally back away not wanting to be the recipient the next time a harsh remark is thrown. We learn to mistrust.

Where is the source of the belief that negative words should always be spoken? Why are we so quick to find fault?

Maybe (and this is a quarter's worth of home-spun) we carry that negative with us because it became part of us in an early formative time. Self-criticism gets awfully heavy and shame sours joy. Guilt suffocates and we cannot sustain it without relief so we morph guilt into anger. Trouble is that the anger is often very misdirected.

Betwixt & Between